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Is It Ever OK to Ghost?

Dressing up like a spooky spirit for Halloween can’t hurt anyone. But what about ghosting someone on social media?

You’ve been chatting online with someone from a different school. You have a ton to talk about and can always make each other LOL. Then, one day, your text goes unanswered. You try another text, but when you get no response, it hits you: You’ve been ghosted. While it’s never fun to have communication cut off without explanation, is it sometimes acceptable? Relationship experts say ghosting is always OK when a person is being abusive or making you feel unsafe. Beyond that, they disagree. Some believe ghosting is a fact of modern life, a harsh but effective way to send the message that a relationship is over. Other experts say that it is unnecessarily hurtful and rude to disappear without an explanation.

Yes

While no one ever wants to be the person being ghosted, I think that ghosting can be OK. Sometimes people don’t take “no” for an answer. If you try to explain why you don’t want to talk to them anymore, they just come up with arguments and excuses to prolong the relationship. Some people may suggest you block a person you don’t want to talk to, but that person can always make new accounts just to keep pestering you. For your own mental health and well-being, you might have to just ignore their messages. The lack of attention and response could be what finally gets them to stop.

—Kyla Ye, a senior in New York

No

There is almost always a better option than ghosting someone. Ghosting causes tremendous pain and feelings of rejection. Additionally, it can be confusing. The person being ghosted might worry that you lost your phone or that something happened to you. When they realize they’ve been ghosted, they might torment themself wondering what they did wrong. Without an answer, they’ll never be able to change their behavior. If you feel like you can't continue with a relationship, you owe it to the other person to explain your feelings. It’s hard being a teen, and we need to be as kind to each other as possible.

—Noel Villepigue, a sophomore in Connecticut

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Debate
torment

noun:

severe physical or mental suffering
tremendous

adjective:

very great in amount, scale, or intensity

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